Friday, April 25, 2014

Sidekicks

Sidekicks have been a mainstay in popular fiction since Achilles and Patroclus or more recently, James Bond and Felix Leiter. For the purposes of my list, I shall limit my sidekicks to these criteria: the listed sidekicks will be friends and/or close companions who accompany or follow the main protagonist on his or her adventures or exploits; the sidekick is generally regarded as a subordinate and sometimes as a comic relief or foil counterpoint. I do not list any male-female duos, for I have not witnessed any such team that has not had at least some romantic undertone as opposed to the "pure" sidekick standard. Let me first list a few names who could be considered sidekicks, but will not be referred to as such here.
Lou Costello, of the comedy team Abbott and Costello. As an equal on the team (or better if you're counting laughs), I do not think of this man
as a mere sidekick. I'm sure Abbott's character does and that makes him a sidekick internally, but not in the realm of external judgment.

Spock, of Star Trek fame. Again, he is referred to as a sidekick in various publications, but I cannot quite see him that way despite his sub-ordinate military rank. Kirk is definitely not Spock's superior in any meaningful manner.

The Skipper, from Gilligan's Island. Since an argument could be made for either the Skipper or Gilligan being the other's sidekick, I feel obliged to rule them both out.

I am not including characters who are supporting characters, but not sidekicks, e.g. Chuck Laylo from Doonesbury, Mr. Drysdale from The Beverly Hillbillies--great characters, but not sidekicks. Finally, I am excluding pairs who might have been considered sidekicks in some other "sidekick list". Martin's friends Tommy and Cole and Richie's pals Ralph and Pottsie are ineligible. At this point, you may be saying, "Gee Whiz...who's on the list?"  Okay, I say 'gee whiz', you probably don't. In any case, let's start at the top this time...

Literary Sidekicks
1. Archie Goodwin   Nero Wolfe's friend and man Friday who is instrumental in solving the big guy's cases
2. John Watson   serves a similar role to Sherlock Holmes; also tells Holmes' tales
3. Sancho Panza   Don Quixote's buddy and fellow horseman
4. Huckleberry Finn   Tom Sawyer's pal who had one of the earliest 'spinoffs' and acquired his own sidekick, Jim (about whose relationship
many essays and critiques have been written)
5. Nick Carraway   Gatsby's admirer and biographer

Super Heroes' Sidekicks
1. Robin, the Boy Wonder   Batman's partner(and ward)  My favourite portrayal: Burt Ward of the 60s television series--unequivocally
2.Jimmy Olsen, reporter   friend and sidekick to Superman and to Clark Kent (if your best friend put on or took off eyeglasses, would you still recognize your friend? I'm just asking)
3. Rick Jones   Marvel Comics' teen sidekick for hire; he befriended the Hulk, Captain America and a couple of others
4. Bucky, Captain America's original teenaged partner in the forties
5. Toro   another forties' sidekick and crime fighting partner (of The Human Torch)

Western Sidekicks
Television and movie (and radio) western heroes were known for having sidekicks who often provided comic relief as well as somebody to rescue from time to time. The exceptions to these formulaic sidekicks were:
1. Artemus Gordon, my favourite sidekick from my favourite show, The Wild Wild West. "Artie" was a scientific  genius who invented weapons and tools in the 1880s, many of which would be ahead of our time in 2010.  Ross Martin was a great Artemus Gordon; Kevin Kline was very good in Silverado, but not very good in The Wild Wild West film.
2. Tonto, the Native American partner of the Lone Ranger. Tonto appeared on radio, television and the big screen. He was featured in comic books and comic strips. He fought, rode and rescued people(including the Lone Ranger). Tonto was not your ordinary sidekick.
One of my favourite jokes has the Lone Ranger and Tonto surrounded on four sides by members of the Sioux, the Apache, the Mohawk and the Commanche tribes. The Lone Ranger says to Tonto, "I think we're in trouble." Tonto looks at him and says, "What do you mean, WE, paleface?"
Now for some more standard western sidekicks:
Roy Rogers had Pat Brady (& Nelly Belle)< Andy Devine and Gabby Hayes
Gene Autry had Smiley Burnette
Hopalong Cassidy had "California"
Marshal Matt Dillon had Chester Goode and Festus on his television show
The Cisco Kid had Pancho
Zorro had Bernardo
Actors such as Walter Brennan, Slim Pickens and Buddy Ebsen made careers playing sidekicks for most of their film lives.

Television Sidekicks
1. Kato   the Green Hornet's assistant and driver. Bruce Lee's portrayal of Kato in the 60s series was so dynamic and overwhelming that only die hards even remember who played the Green Hornet. How many sidekicks can whip their bosses?  Just asking?
2. Ethel Mertz   Lucy's best friend and tag along fall girl
3. Barney Fife  another character who ended up dominating the screen...Mayberry's deputy to Sheriff Andy Taylor
4. Gus  Psych's inimitable sidekick to funnyman fake psychic Shawn
5. Hawk   from the books to the small screen, Hawk was Spenser's friend and go-to guy when things got tough
6. Ed Norton   Ralph Kramden's pal from The Honeymooners
7. Rhoda  the first  one of Mary's friends who had her own spinoff series
8. Maynard   Dobie Gillis' beatnik friend who redefined laziness in the person of Bob Denver
 Countess Vaughn should be recognized as one of the great sidekicks for her portrayal of Kim Parker on two sitcoms. In 187 episodes of Moesha and The Parkers, respectively , she was funny every time I watched her (no, I did not see every episode)
 Similarly, Stacey Dash played the same sidekick role (Dee) in the movie and television versions of Clueless.(no additional comment)

Movie sidekicks are not as prevalent these days unless there are sequels involved. It is difficult to have a sidekick who truly displays an important role and exudes his/her own independent character in a single film. Morgan Freeman has played a number of strong supporting roles, but dare I call them sidekick roles? Perhaps this is true only to Costner's Robin Hood. I can think of two characters who fulfill the sidekick requirements :Mini-Me of Austin Powers' movies, a pretty funny guy, and Silent Bob
Under other circumstances, Goose, sidekick to Maverick in Top Gun could have made the list.

Arsenio Hall, Rue McClanahan, Jackee Harry...good sidekick people; but how about Jerome, Morris Day's valet? He's one of the best!
Ed McMahon is famous for being the quintessential sidekick. He introduced Johnny Carson in the oft emulated manner he made famous. Then he sat with Johnny and the Tonight Show guests and laughed whenever Johnny told a joke . I'm not knocking it...they say that the hardest part to play is 'second fiddle'.

Cartoon Character Sidekick Countdown
honourable mentions: Wimpy, Lothar and Sideshow Bob
8. Tinker Bell (Peter Pan)
7. Odie (Garfield)
6. Jiminy Cricket (Pinocchio)
5. Baba Looey (Quick Draw McGraw)
4. Pinky (The Brain)
3. Boo Boo (Yogi Bear)
I do not really like seeing a tie for first place on lists, especially my own lists. But, I cannot decide this time.  Both of these characters have an iconic presence. They are both funny and silly and often important to the leading characters. They have both been around for decades
--Jughead Jones (Archie Andrews' best friend) and Barney Rubble (Fred Flintstone's best friend) Help me out and cast a vote...
 (special note: Bullwinkle was Rocky's sidekick at the onset, but he reversed the relationship on our rodent friend)
Before closing, I must mention that the greatest true life example of a sidekick (to my knowledge) is James Boswell.  Boswell devoted  much of his life to following, assisting and chronicling the life of Samuel Johnson. Johnson is famous for writing  his dictionary in 1775. As a noted essayist, poet and lexicographer, Samuel Johnson was a man who probably deserved a biography. However, as time passed, the biography itself became more famous than the man in many circles .James Boswell is not famous for being a lawyer and scholar, but for writing about Johnson.  In fact, the word 'Boswelian' was coined from Boswell's name. Its meaning is: constant companion; observer.

If anybody out  needs a biographer, I can be Boswelian...oh, yes I can.  So long for now.
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Friday, April 18, 2014

Top Ten Cartoon Characters

10. Beany & Cecil: what an introduction to satire and sarcasm; Cecil, the seasick sea serpent was a clever ( often corny ) wisecracker...as are most of my cartoon favourites. This show was just funny.
9. Bluto/Brutus: the arch-enemy and rival of Popeye. As Bluto, he was a muscular bully who gave as good as he got. When his name changed to Brutus, he got flabby and meaner (he even became a bank robber once). Bluto was/is,in my opinion, the greatest cartoon bad guy I've seen.
8. Daffy Duck: do I really have to say anymore?
7. Popeye: what a fine example for little ones: polite, generous, caring, brave...and he encouraged us to eat spinach . He even took in a child who..(better not go there lol)
6. Sylvester: the number two loser of all time gotta love him
I saw five modern examples of well crafted cartoons within the last few years:
Pinky and the Brain, Duckman, The Animaniacs, Dexter's Laboratory and Johnny Bravo
5. Wile E. Coyote: the number one loser (no help from Acme) I root for Wile E. Coyote and yet I find myself wanting the Road Runner to escape--what a paradox. Isn't it great that cartoon characters can run over a cliff and suspend the laws of physics? Gravity will not affect them until they look down.
4. Bugs Bunny, that Oscar winning rabbit:He's slick, quick and slippery as can be. Bugs knows 'what's up"
3. Top Cat: this was the coolest cat on television. He had a gang of alley cats who followed him from adventure to adventure. Top Cat (TC) outwitted crooks and cops alike. His theme song was cool too. I have all of his cartoons on DVD.
2. Droopy: this sad-faced beagle was slow and steady and he always got his 'man' (usually canine or lupine) Tex Avery's best creation entertained me and my brothers for hours and hours.
1. FOGHORN LEGHORN
I can watch Foghorn endlessly (figuratively). His southern drawl, his self-assuredness, hiis distinct way of relating to all of the supporting characters...don't get me , ah say, don't get me started

Final note: Although his cartoons are forgettable, Porky Pig must be mentioned. He is THE Warner Bros. icon. He's a harmless, friendly happy-go-lucky fellow. There, I said it. It would be too too corny for me to quote Porky Pig now ; and since I can't stutter as well as he does, I'll just say:
So long for now.
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Friday, April 11, 2014

Thirty "Must See" Modern Movies

These movies (1984 - 2006) are listed in the order of their release years, though not necessarily by actual release date. I'll post a new movie list soon (2007 - present). I have saved the top four for last.
#5 - #30:
Remo Williams The Adventure Begins (1985) I saw this action movie at the theatre with my mother 25 years ago. We enjoyed it immensely. Joel Grey is fantastic in it.
Silverado (1985) This movie is a throwback to the Westerns on which I grew up great stuff
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986) Remember those old movies wherein the hapless hero (Jerry Lewis, Don Knotts, et al) could do nothing right? Well, Ferris can do no wrong...the proverbial good-luck guy.
Aliens (1986) Lots of excitement...better than its predecessor
School Daze (1988) The first full colour Spike Lee Joint...good plot, good singing, good movie
Goodfellas (1990) Joe Pesci at his crazy-best. I read the book first, and the movie was just as good
The Marrying Man (1991) The movie that united Kim Basinger and Alec Baldwin...real good stuff
Boomerang (1992) I can watch it any time --  Eddie Murphy and Robin Givens, are you kidding?
Passenger 57 (1992) The action is still great and not outdated
Class Act (1992) Kid and Play in a very underrated comedy. Kid is hilarious
A Bronx Tale (1993) My favourite DeNiro movie. This film is great in so many ways
Heart and Souls (1993) Drama, comedy, pathos...and the great Alfre Woodard
Demolition Man (1993) Snipes vs. Stallone in the (near?) future. Lots of fun
Baby's Day Out (1994) The scene in the park made me laugh until I cried
Shawshank Redemption (1994) This movie made many people's lists and with good reason. The acting is fantastic, the story is great, the movie is simply rewarding each time
Low Down Dirty Shame (1994) An action-comedy that always amuses
Devil in a Blue Dress (1995) Very good mystery thriller. Denzel is good and Don (Cheadle) is too good
Eraser (1996) Another exciting action flick on my list...this movie is fun to watch
A Time to Kill (1996) The drama is intense and thrilling. I loved seeing the klansmen getting battered
Con Air (1997) What an adrenaline HIGH (pun intended)
Jackie Brown (1997) When you absolutely have to kill everybody in the room...
The Mask of Zorro (1998) I love sword fighting more than gunfights, fistfights or any other movie fights. This movie took me back to Tyrone Power and Errol Flynn (and Catherine Zeta-Jones wasn't bad either)
U.S. Marshals (1998) Tommy Lee Jones reprised his Oscar winning role from The Fugitive and Wesley Snipes displayed some of his great fighting skills
Romeo Must Die (2000) Lots of fun...lots of fights
The Last Castle (2001) Along with Shawshank Redemption, one of the top prison movies of the past few decades
Dreamgirls (2006) Have you seen this movie? Then you understand...

The Top Four (in chronological order)
A Soldier's Story (1984) I have a friend who can imitate the voices and do the scenes from this movie. Of course there's nothing like the movie itself. A must see definitely
Road House (1989) A philosophy major kickin' butt? How can I not love it?
White Men Can't Jump (1992) Basketball...chases...trash talk...something for everyone (oh yeah, I believe Rosie Perez is in it also)
Enemy of the State (1998) It could happen to any of us...seriously. Will Smith is fantastic in this film

Thank you for allowing me to share some of my favourites with you. So long for now.

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Saturday, April 5, 2014

Eddie Murphy Movies

From stand-up comic to television star to Golden Globe winning actor, Eddie Murphy has made his mark in the entertainment world.
The range of talent this man has displayed on film is incredible: comedy, drama, impersonations, music.  How about  a short quiz ?
The Five by Five Eddie Murphy Test
Name 5 comedy superstars who have played in films with Eddie Murphy.
Name 5 Academy Award nominees who have played significant roles in movies with Eddie Murphy.(for a bonus, name 8)
Name 5 movies in which Eddie Murphy played dual or multiple roles.
Name 5 movies in which Eddie Murphy was arrested and/or spent time in jail.
Name 5 roles Eddie Murphy played in which he was in law enforcement .

Eddie Murphy has reprised roles played by such icons as Jerry Lewis, Bill Cosby and Rex Harrison.  When he is at his best, there are few,if any, today who can match him. Yes, he's had some flops; but even some of  his 'flops' would make other actors happy. Daddy Day Care grossed over $150 million.  Norbit was nominated for an Oscar for Makeup and Harlem Nights for Costume Design.
 Murphy's  forte is playing fast talking con men-types, but he plays other roles with equal aplomb. These are my Top Twenty Eddie Murphy Films  (not including his live comedy performances or any animated movies featuring his voice)

20. Imagine That   2009  E.M. plays a father whose daughter has magic powers which he (mis)uses
19. Beverly Hills Cop 3   1994  the worst installment of the trilogy despite Theresa Randle
18. Harlem Nights   1989  arguably the movie with the most comedy potential ever...it delivered to a point
17. Dr. Dolittle   1998  hey, I'm an animal lover
16. Vampire in Brooklyn   1995  E.M played multiple roles in this underrated comedy-horror movie
15. Bowfinger   1999  Eddie Murphy and Steve Martin...neither at their best, but good enough
14. Holy Man   1998  this one caught me off guard; see it when you get a chance
13. 48 Hours   1982  E.M made his first big screen appearance in this film...what a debut (one scene- -in a bar--is fantastic)
12. The Nutty Professor 2: The Klumps   2000  no wonder E.M is the biggest comedy box office star in history
11. Beverly Hills Cop 2   1987  this was only his sixth movie, but E.M was already a polished veteran

Has any other actor played with Robin Givens, Sheryl Lee Ralph, Thandie Newton, Beyonce Knowles, Halle Berry, Janet Jackson, Lela Rochon, Charlotte Lewis and Victoria Dillard? (just a question)

10.The Golden Child   1986  good plot involving  fate and providence with action and laughs
 9. Beverly Hills Cop   1984  called the first "buddy cop movie"...this was E.M as a Detroit cop in California...good stuff
 8. The Nutty Professor   1996  E.M  was equal  to the task (or better than) that was set before him in remaking the Jerry Lewis
      classic    not only did he play a great Buddy Love, but  six other roles in addition...phenomenal work
 7. The Distinguished Gentleman   1992  good political comic satire
 6. Life   1999  such an underrated movie   E.M is very good and you won't believe the comedy stars who are in this film
 5. Trading Places   1983  E.M.'s second feature film; but his genius shows already   classic material
 4. Metro   1997  E.M as a hostage negotiator for the police...lots of action, very good backstory with Carmen Ejogo
 3. Dreamgirls   2006  this could have been number one save for the fact that it is not strictly an E.M vehicle...Murphy has a strong presence and his performance garnered many awards, but the ensemble cast  prevented this from being viewed as an "Eddie Murphy movie" per se (though it is a movie starring Eddie Murphy)  are you more confused now?
 2. Boomerang   1992  E.M. at his charming best...and Eartha Kitt's supporting role was priceless...this is the E.M movie which is probably the most stylized and features  E.M  with the confidence and swagger he often parodies...had he played the role a bit more pronounced, I think it would have been over the top,,,he was excellent
 1. Coming to America   1988  another multiple role extravaganza for E.M.(including the part of an older Jewish man)...this movie had humour, a love story, cultural wit, and even James Earl Jones...E.M plays the 'fish out of water' role as if he had invented it
   Coming to America had so many great scenes that I cannot list them...I think I'll watch it again

Axel Foley, Reggie Hammond, Billy Ray Valentine, Prince Akeem...Murphy has given us so many memorable characters and he has given us so much laughter that I see no reason not to call him a superstar.(and he just turned fifty three ...darn youngster)

So long for now.

Friday, March 28, 2014

Favourite Children's Stories, Tales and Fables

Perhaps I am thinking of children's stories because I've been reading in elementary schools this month. When I was in elementary school, I liked to hear the teacher read stories. I truly loved it when my mother read stories to us at home (bedtime or any time).  I still enjoy reading stories to children. One of the keys to reading to children is to change your voice for the different characters (fun for the reader also).

This week I have three short lists followed by a Top Twelve List. I'm sure you know most of these stories, if not all of them.

Four favourite Fables:
The Fox and the Grapes   the old 'sour grapes' tale
The Tortoise and the Hare   slow and steady wins the race (despite knowing the story, I still rooted for that doggone hare each time)
The Dog and the Manger   unfortunately I know people who are very much like that dog
The Lion and the Mouse   possibly the best of all of Aesop's fables
These four fables and many many others were told by Aesop, but most of them were not written by Aesop. Instead, they were passed along in an oral tradition that was very rich in many cultures.  African, Asian and Native American fables and folktales were attributed to the nations rather than having  a single person credited with authorship.In fact, the Brothers Grimm collected and recorded fairy tales which had circulated before their time.   

Four Favourite Fairy Tales:
Hansel and Gretel   a German horror tale collected by the Grimm Brothers
The Ugly Duckling   one of Hans Christian Anderson's more popular tales
Cinderella   of the dozen or so versions I've seen, I still find the Disney Cartoon the most fun
Jack and the Beanstalk   admit it...Jack would be considered a gangster today
Many of the stories passed down through the ages are for working class children and these stories often paint the rich and powerful as villains. At the same time, the goal of the poor girl or boy is to marry into a royal family. Oh well...

Four Books I Enjoyed (as a boy):
The Saggy Baggy Elephant  by Kathryn Jackson   a story of feeling like an outcast before learning one's identity
The Little Engine That Could  by Watty Piper   I used to really like this; it has a childlike appeal
Ferdinand the Bull   by Munro Leaf   you don't have to act like the other bulls just because you're a bull       interesting
Walter, the Lazy Mouse  by  Marjorie Flack  what a treat this was in my third grade classroom...an anti-laziness lesson    Walter was so lazy that by the time he was ready to go to school, the others were already coming home. He consistently overslept and one time, he slept so long that his parents forgot about him and moved without him. That's when his lesson began.

There are many stories that delighted me as a youth.  Most of them are not on these lists. I should mention that none of my lists are all-inclusive lists, but merely a reflection of my opinion (at the time). Before my top 12 are listed, I would like to note my appreciation for the stories of Dr. Seuss which were read to me and my brothers decades ago. Although we were entertained by all of the Seuss books, How the Grinch Stole Christmas is a classic among classics.  At one point in my life, I had memorized most of that story-poem. The Dr. Seuss style enchanted me so much that I wrote my first book, Benny and the Basketball Bully, in rhymed verse.

The Top Twelve:
12. The Princess and the Pea  H.C. Anderson  
11. The Emperor's New Clothes  H.C. Anderson  deep message for all of us
10. The Three Little Pigs   you know the fairy tale, but please try to check out The Three Little Bops, a 1957 jazz cartoon featuring the pigs as a jazz combo with a trumpet playing wolf trying to join their group...great stuff (Looney Tunes)
 9. The Five Chinese Brothers  a Chinese folktale about five brothers whose unity saves the day   the book came into controversy some years ago because the American artists drew the pictures of the characters in a heavy handed stereotypical manner   the criticism of the artwork was justified, but the story still stands up pretty well
 8. The Hippopotamus and the Tortoise  a Nigerian folktale( upon which Rumpelstiltskin was partly based and which the Grimm Brothers collected). This story is quite entertaining . Please treat yourself and your children to it.
 7. The Brave Little Tailor  seven in one blow  I love, I mean, loved this story; another Grimm Brothers tale
 6. The Story of the Three Bears  by Robert Southey, who admitted that he had heard this story circulated before he 'wrote' it. In the versions before Southey's, the precursor to Goldilocks was clearly considered the antagonist. In other words, Goldilocks was the villain
and the bears were the victims. This is what I've been saying for almost fifty years!! Somehow the little blonde girl has been turned into the innocent defenseless plaintiff.(darned media)
 5. The Little Red Hen  a Russian folktale   no work--no food
 4. The Three Billy Goats Gruff  my favourite of the classic "literary three" wherein each entry proves to be bigger or better or more interesting than the last...and the third is last   As the eldest brother, I identified with the oldest billy goat who saved the day.
 3. The Bremen Town Musicians   animals, music, crime fighting...how could it go wrong?
 2. The 12 Dancing Princesses  another Grimm masterpiece   read it again (to your children, of course)  a classic example of the king and his daughters' suitors (or would be suitors)
 1. Stone Soup  the folktale to end all folktales   a powerful story of sharing          all for all

So long for now.

Friday, March 21, 2014

100 Things That Make Me Happy

This list was written in the nineties. I am reprinting it exactly as I wrote it approximately fifteen years ago. I hope you like it.

David's List
There are a number of things that tick us off these days and we don't mind telling each other when we're peeved.
But, how about the things that delight us? Here are 100 things that make me happy.

The sound of birds singing
Watching a riderless horse
A pregnant woman (especially when she's smiling)
Broccoli with cheese
Black-and-white movies
A star-filled sky
The New York Yankees
Boogie Woogie piano
A well done prat fall
A woman with sass
Easter hats
The sound of trumpets
Identical twins
Black Cherry ice cream
Grey Flannel cologne
Listening to an elderly gentleman
Making a child laugh
Rosie Perez' voice
Spinach and cheese
Wooden floors and furniture
A cold Dr.Pepper
Twist endings
Seeing an animal feed its baby
Memories of my grandparents
Scrambled eggs with cheese

Announcing mate-in-three
A tiger's walk
The smell of White Diamonds
Learning a new game
Louis Armstrong's horn
Louis Armstrong's voice
Grocery shopping (without a list)
Reruns of The Wild Wild West
A little boy in a suit
Hot summer days
Reading to my mother
Fifty-dollar bills
That old time gospel music
Sheryl Lee Ralph's dimples
Singing along with Mitch
Foghorn Leghorn
Cake with icing
Starting a new mystery book
A grazing cow
A good karate flick
Oddjob vs. James Bond
Asparagus (with cheese)
Notre Dame sports
Christmas shopping
1930s movie dialogue

Sheryl Lee Ralph's eyes
A record player
Farm animals
Hearing my mother's voice
Watching a good musical
The Nicholas Brothers
Finding paper money in the dryer
An old fashioned porch swing
Drawing with a pencil
Seamed stockings
Honeydew melon
Falling in love
Sitting in the theatre, popcorn in hand
A Rickey Henderson slide
Doris Day on film
Doris Day on wax
A kiss on the cheek from an elderly woman
Beeman's Pepsin gum
Hitting my number (straight!)
Moon River sung by Jerry Butler
Doo Wop sung by just about anybody
Watching a child show off her school work
Seeing my mother laugh
Ice cold lemonade in the summer
A banana split (at any time)

Listening to Dinah Washington
Photographing indoors
Seeing a bulldog
The first glimpse of the baseball diamond when I'm walking up the ramp
Watchng Sugar Ray fight (Robinson, not Leonard)
Mushroom pizzas (with extra cheese)
Wilson Pickett's shouts
M.C.Hammer's moves
Sheryl Lee Ralph's lips
The junior phase of Ms Pac-Man
A pie-in-the-face on television
A female southern accent
Macaroni and cheese
Okay...cheese!
Watching a squirrel watch me
Doing crossword puzzles in ink
Laughing so hard I cry
Listening to someone who knows
My brothers
A James Cagney film
Being in love
Writing lists
A good shoe shine
Beating the contestants on Jeopardy
Settling down for a good night's sleep after a real good day


So long for now. 

Friday, March 14, 2014

Not Just A Song & A Dance

Who doesn't like being entertained?
I love good singing, good dancing, good comedians, good acting and good musicians. But what of those talented people who are not billed as any of the aforementioned? There are plenty of acts that fall into different categories (which is not to say that the entertainers do not include some comedy or song in their performances ). With the exception of sports, I have listed two dozen of my favourite forms of entertainment.
Of course I shall first list a few acts that I would not care to see (or hear):
Sword swallowing
Puppeteers
Hog callers
High wire artists
Contortionists
Clowns (I really enjoyed them decades and decades ago--especially Milky--but not anymore)
Guessers...of weights, ages,etc.
I am not saying for one moment that the above listed are not talented, just that I have no desire to see them. In the Top 24  List which follows, I shall not necessarily be touting one talent over another. I would not say that The Nicholas Brothers were better than Louis Armstrong (that may even sound like a silly comparison to some folks). Ah, but I could say that I would prefer to see one over the other--
a tough call in this example.
Here are a few talents which almost made the list...quick change artists, pool table trick shooters, destroyers/wreckers. When I was ten, I'm pretty sure that the destroyers would have been at the top of the list. Have you seen the two guys on television who destroy offices and rooms in minutes!? Free runners would be at the top of my list today if their venue were a bit more contained and I could see them on stage as opposed to over an expanse of territory and property...talk about an exciting skill.

24  Acts  I  Enjoy

24. Caricaturists   I enjoy watching a good ten-minute rendering
23. Animal Tricks   (some...and not in a circus)
22. Whistling   an underrated skill which we seldom witness anymore
21. Cheering   not until I met a competitive cheerleader did I realize the intricacies of cheering (and did you know that Samuel L. Jackson
                        and George Bush were cheerleaders? well, Halle Berry and Madonna, too)
20. Jumping Rope   have you seen Mark Breland jumping rope? treat yourself
19. Jugglers
18. Yo Yo masters   Steve Brown and comedian Tom Smothers are excellent...I was fairly good with a Duncan Imperial in 1969
17. "Invulnerability"   various stages of imperviousness to pain   incredible
16. Balancing and Stacking Objects
15. Cowboy Tricks   including lariat tricks (Will Rogers started this way), fast draws and trick shots(Sammy Davis was an expert)
14. Human Statues   the skill this takes, wow   my wife and I  saw a guy so good that he looked like an actual statue   we witnessed 
                                 something terrible as a couple tried unsucessfully to make him move before putting out a cigaret on his hand
                                of course, he moved then--and in anger
13. Tumbling/Acrobats
12. Fast Eatiers  one name: Kobayashi   I won three fast eating contests in my youth; the funniest incident was when my brothers
                           and I came in first, second and third in a backyard picnic watermelon eating contest. Our mother was not proud, but
                           embarrassed--go figure
11. Fast Talkers  Clio Award winner and world record holder, John Moschitta comes to mind.  His 586 wpm clip became well
                             known in commercials in the eighties
10. Mimes   quite the contrary to the last entry   I especially liked Shields and Yarnell, who had their own television show
 9. Target Hitting   be it arrow or knife, bullet or playing card , this activity hits the bullseye for me   
 8. Yodeling   my wife and I may be the only ones I know who appreciate yodeling   it can be considered a form of falsetto
                     singing, but it is also utilized as a communication technique in parts of Central Africa and in the Alps  Bette Midler
                     is one of the few (recent) stars I've heard yodeling
 7. Magic   I've seen so many magicians that I usually bypass them these days, but some of them are still pretty incredible
                 the sleight-of-hand pickpockets are out of sight (pun intended)
 6. Feats of Strength   not strongman contests, which are great, but considered sports contests...rather individual feats are
                                    the type of act I mean to include here
 5. Martial Arts demonstrations   especially swordplay   no board breaking here
 4. Memory Tricks   David Farrow memorized 59 decks of cards in random order (world record)   one performer on stage had 
                               audience members stand up and say their names--he then told them their telephone numbers; he had
                              memorized the local telephone book...and I would love to meet Jill Price, who is not a performer but has a
                              most advanced form of hyperthymestic syndrome wherin she remembers virtually everything
 3. Ventriloquists  remember Willie Tyler and Lester, Paul Winchell, Shari Lewis    what remarkable talents  Jeff Dunham is
                             one of the few modernists with whom I'm acquainted
 2. Sound Effects   Herb Dixon is great, but I've never seen anyone to match Michael Winslow (from Police Academy fame).
                              I saw Winslow in Detroit in the nineties:one of the best shows I've ever attended.
 1. Impersonations   There have been many fantastic impersonators: Frank Gorshin, Rich Little, Sammy Davis, Jr. (yes, he
                                  was great in so many areas), Marilyn Michaels.  Eddie Murphy is very good also as is Frank Pisani.
                                 But there is one special entertainer who was an excellent impersonator as well as a comedian, singer
                                 and dancer. His name was George Kirby. He could sing like Ella Fitzgerald and Sarah Vaughan-wow.
                                 (he was a voice impersonator, not a female impersonator/incidental and coincidental ) Kirby's tale is
                                 a bittersweet one. But, treat yourself--he's on YouTube for the modern audience.

Although I'd rather see an excellent tumbler, for example, than a poor ventriloquist (Edgar Bergen), what I am trying to
convey is that 'all things being equal' (which they are not), I'd prefer an excellent voice impersonator to an excellent
"anything else".  Now, if only I could see a ventriloquist who did impersonations and sound effects...ther goes my
paycheck, 'cause THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT.
So long for now.                                              
  • Muriel Motorcitygirl Murray-Broomfield Wow, this is really an interesting list. Although I don't thing that Candice would agree with your assessment of her dad. I have never been a fan of ventriloquists, because I've always thought the "du